Spell Jokes
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What's the difference between an American and a Canadian?
A: An Canadian not only has a sense of humour but can also spell it.
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Why do men like BMWs?
Because they can spell it. LOL LOL
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How do you spell a hated opponent with three letters?
NME (enemy).
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What's the favorite subject of young witches at school?
Spelling.
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How do you spell coward?
S-O-N-Y
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Which ones?
Wife: BLTOUR & E Me: Well, that could spell trouble
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Why does America spell some words differently?
They said "We can do it without u, Britain."
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What illness are you suffering from if you keep seeing cartoon animals who talk?
Disney spells.
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Why is does a chicken coop have 2 doors?
Because if it had 4 doors it'd be called a chicken sedan. (better if saying it out loud because of the spelling of coop/coupe) -
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What has seven arms and can't spell?
Def Leppard
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How do you spell Canda?
C,eh,N,eh,D,eh
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Why did the young witch have such difficulty writing letters?
She had never learned to spell properly.
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Why is Hillary spelled with 2 L's?
One for 2008 and one for 2016.
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Why is it spelled 'cancelled' in the UK, but 'canceled' in the US?
Because the US gave the UK that L back in 1776.
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Why do Polish people's names end in 'ski'?
Because they can't spell toboggan.
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How does it spell?
dg".
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How do you spell socks in Spanish?
Eso si que es.
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What's the difference between a Warlock and a Sorcerer?
Apart from the Spelling?
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What happened to the naughty little witch at school?
She was ex-spelled.
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How do you spell relief?
F-A-R-T
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What do you call a beast made entirely from egg whites?
A Meringue-u-tang!!! Note: I know it's spelled Orangutan. :P
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What's your best pick up line?
Cocaine Edit:spelling
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What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
Look! They spelled MACY's wrong!"
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Why did reddit's admins go back to school?
because they can't spell "read it".
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How do you spell 'way' with an 'f'?
There's no 'f' in way
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What do the wage gap and the story of Hercules have in common?
They're both myths.
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How do you spell women backwards?
Kitchen
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How does Al Gore spell potato?
A: T-A-T-E-R.
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How do you spell wrong?
R o n g. That's wrong. That's what you asked for isn't it
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How do you spell candy with two letters?
C and Y
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How do you spell Canada?
C-Eh?-N-Eh?-D-Eh?
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How can you spell chilly with two letters?
IC (icy) .
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What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
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What word in the dictionary is always spelled wrong?
Wrong.
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How do you spell hypocrisy?
R-E-L-I-G-I-O-N
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Why do blondes drive BMWs?
A1: Because they can spell it. A2: Because they can spell BWM.
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Why do emo's always act so sour?
Because you can't spell Lemon without emo.
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What did you get 100 in?
Jason: Two things: I got 50 in Spelling and 50 in History. Mother: Well at least you can add !
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How do you spell ichael?
The teacher was rather bewildered. "Don't you mean Michael " she asked. "No ma'am. I've written the 'M' already."
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Why was the student witch so bad at essays?
Because she couldn't spell properly.
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How do you spell "nose" is Spanish?
nose
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How do you spell "apathy"?
I don't care.
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How does a Metal Wizard perform his spells?
He ChromeCasts. anDruid humor.
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How do you spell no?
Me: Sound it out. What makes the na na na na na na na na na sound 4: Batman (Spelling is hard)
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What is woman spelled backwards?
Kitchen
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How do you spell moron?
M O R M O N
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Why a pirate could not spell iris?
He had only one 'i'
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What spell does harry Potter use on halloween?
Spoopify
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Why do all polish names end in SKI ?
They can't spell TOBOGGAN !
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How do you spell Canada in Canadian?
C, eh! N, eh!, D, eh!
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Why do Polish names end in "ski" ?
A: Because they can't spell tobbagan.
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Why can't Pirates spell the alfhabet?
RRRRRRRRRRRRRgh
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How do you spell "Pringles" in Spanish?
Pringls
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How do you spell badly?
With a broken magic wand.
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What's the difference between a chicken and a hen?
The spelling.
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How does a horny guy spell relief?
A: B-L-O-N-D-E.
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Why shouldn't you laugh when a black man falls off his bike?
It could be your bike. EDIT: Spelling.
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How does Bono spell color?
With or without "u"
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How do you spell that?
t-h-a-t
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What does a witch use to see if her spells are going to work?
Spell check!
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How do you spell elephant ?
E-l-l-e-e-f-a-n-t "That's not how the dictionary spells it" "You didn't ask me how the dictionary spelt it !"
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What's the reason Bollywood Cast parties are awkward?
They think Cast is spelled with an e.
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Why do blondes drive VWs?
A: Because they can spell it.
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What do you call a bee who's had a spell put on him ?
He's bee-witched !
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How do you know that you're a peaceful country?
When you realize that you can't spell country without UN.
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What did the doctor say to the witch in hospital?
With any luck you'll be able to get up for a spell.
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How do you spell "laughing out loud" by using binary?
1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1
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What insect can be spelled with just one letter?
Bee.
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What do you call a chicken with no neck?
A Hic. ----- wife hit me with this one today. Remove the n. E. C. And k. From chicken and it spells hic. I'm sorry Reddit.
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What do you call a cantaloupe who can't elope?
A cantaloupe. The spelling is completely different...
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How are Harambe memes keeping up?
Cincinnati Zoo keeps trying to shoot them down.
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What's a word that no matter how much you spelled it, it always wrong?
Wrong, the word is wrong
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What is the only word in an English dictionary spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly is the only word spelled I n c o r r e c t l y
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What 11 letter word does every Yale graduate spell incorrectly?
I n c o r r e c t l y
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Why must judges learn to spell well?
A: They must follow the letter of the law.
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Why do polish people all have ski at the end of their name?
Why do polish people all have ski at the end of their name? Because they can't spell toboggan.
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How do you spell Mississippi?
Redneck: Which one The river or the state
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Why isn't Christmas spelled Christmals?
Because Noel.
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What did Eminem say when his label spelled his name wrong?
It doesn't Mather.
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What's the difference between a normal woman and a witch?
The spelling Teehee
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What word is always spelled wrong?
Wrong
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Why do all polish names end in ski?
Because they can't spell toboggan (This joke brought to you by a 90 yr old polish man I take care of at a nursing home)
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How can you spell too much with two letters?
XS (excess).
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What do you see when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?
A flat miner. EDIT: spelling
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What word is always spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly. I'll see myself out.
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Why do pop artists hate shoe shopping?
They have too many ft. *edit for spelling
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What is the difference between walking a dog in America and China?
The spelling.
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What's the difference between a "narrative" and a "circle jerk"?
How you spell them.
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Why isn't Cindy spelled Sindie?
Whoever caid C makes an S cound was ctupid.
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How do you drowned a hipster?
Throw them in the mainstream. Edit: spelling because I'm 5
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Why is 'dark' spelled with a k and not with c?
Because you can't see in the dark Badambum!
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Why did the blonde move to L.A.?
Blonde: I don't know. Why Teller: It was easier to spell. Blonde: Easier than what
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How do you spell "SHOP"?
Me: S-H-O-P Friend: How do you say it Me: "Shop" Friend: What do you do when you get to a green light
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What is the worst way to spell Mississippi?
Correctly.
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Why are hemorrhoid and diarrhea so hard to spell?
Like if you're talking about them, you aren't having a rough enough time already.
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Why did the kid cross the playground?
To get to the other slide. Edit: spelling.
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How do you spell onomatopoeia?
Just spell it like the way it sounds!
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Why did Caitlyn Jenner have a differently spelled version of Caitlin?
Because she can't get rid of the Y chromosome
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How do you spell "candy" with only 2 letters?
and
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How do you spell "we" with two letters without using the letters W and E?
U and I.
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What are the two biggest differences between an alligator and a crocodile?
The spelling and pronunciation.
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What's a ducks favourite snack?
Quackers! **EDIT: Spelling**
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?
A Tyrannosaurus Wrecks. EDIT: Spelled "Tyrannosaurus" incorrectly.