Chip Jokes

What do you call chips that aren't yours?

Nacho chips

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What's the best part about being an orphan?

All your chips and candy bars are family sized.

Why are Australians so well balanced?

They have a chip on both shoulders.

What happens to a plate made out of cookies when you drop it?

It chips.

How do you fit 3 babies in a bowl?

Blender. How do you get them out? Chips.

What does the Pope dip his chips in?

Holy Guacamole

Why do Kenyans always win marathons?

At the end, they get a bag of chips and a Coke. -My dad told me this joke when we went to a race-

How many McDonald's counter girls does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to put some chips with it.

Who's cheese is on those chips?

Fixed And I said, "Well, obviously *na-chos*." Get it It sounds like '*not yours*' with an accent.

What did the potato name his son?

Chip. Sorry.

Why did the dorito feel left out?

Cause he didn't chip in!

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What are a philosopher's favorite type of chips?

Plato Nachos

Who's there ! Chip ! Chip who ?

Chip of Fools !

What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher?

Would you like ketchup with your chips

What do you do for a living?

The engineer replies " I make chips" "Oh yummy!"

What's the difference between a bag of chips and a duck with the flu?

One's a quick snack and the other's a sick quack!

Why do Australians have a well balanced walk?

They've a chip on both shoulders

Why was the fish processing factory built beside the computer factory?

So that they could make fish and chips.

Why did the chip chase the sauce?

To ketchup Edit: I'm sorry

When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency?

When the chips are down!

How does a psychic open a bag of chips?

They Tarot.

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What did pancake Chip say to his friend pancake Berry when Berry was sad?

Don't feel blue, Berry, things will get batter"

How do you chip thin ice off a window?

You bust a rime.

What did one cookie say to the other cookie ?

You've got a chip on your shoulder. What did the deer say to the bear Your unbearable

How did the lawyer chip his tooth?

The ambulance slammed on its brakes.

How much salt does Jihadi John have on his chips?

Just a Daesh.

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it's half empty.

Why did the reporter only dunk chips in the middle of the dip?

He just wanted the inside scoop.

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Orphan Jokes More Orphan Jokes

What does an orphan and a bottle of champagne have in common?

They both lost their pop.

Why do orphans play tennis?

It's the only way they can get love.

Fool Jokes More Fool Jokes

What is Mr. T's favorite month?

April, fools

What do you call Al-Qaeda's April Fools prank?

A jihahahad!

Salsa Jokes More Salsa Jokes

What is Chip Kelly's favorite dance?

The Salsa

What does Pikachu say when he puts too much salsa on his food?

PIKA PIKA PIKA (Credit to my 5 year old son)

Shoulder Jokes More Shoulder Jokes

What do you call a black man in a ghetto walking around with a boombox on his shoulders?

A stereotype

How does every ethnic joke start?

By looking over your shoulder.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What baby?

Oh, so you're not pregnant '

What's pink and red and can't turn round in a corridor?

A: A baby with a javellin through its head.

Good Jokes More Good Jokes

What is the best part of having Alzheimer's?

Youre always meeting new people.

What's the best part about sleeping with twenty five year olds?

There's twenty of them.

Nacho Jokes More Nacho Jokes

What do you call a Mexican drowning in a vat of cheese?

Nacho problem.

What do you call an average Mexican?

Nacho average guy

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How do snails get their shells all shiny?

They use snail polish.

How many hippies does it take to change a lightbulb?

Please help. There are ten so far and they have invited their gross friends to our home. They are using the broken lightbulb to smoke crack off of.